Remember that Atlantic article about how women writers should only have one kid? I hated it. As it happens, so did Zadie Smith!

 “I have two children,” she said. “Dickens had ten - I think Tolstoy did, too. Did anyone for one moment worry that those men were becoming too father-ish to be writer-esque?

“Does the fact that Heidi Julavitz, Nikita Lalwani, Nicole Krauss, Jhumpa Lahiri, Vendela Vida, Curtis Sittenfeld, Marilynne Robinson, Toni Morrison and so on and so forth (I could really go on all day with that list) have multiple children make them lesser writers? Are four children a problem for the writer Michael Chabon - or just for his wife the writer Ayelet Waldman?

“The idea that motherhood is inherently somehow a threat to creativity is just absurd.” 

Many, many authors had similar reactions. The Telegraph collected them in the article, “Motherhood is no threat to creativity, author Zadie Smith says.” Obviously, what Zadie Smith says goes. 

My mom has a knack for giving people presents they really don’t want. Do you know how many Longaberger baskets she’s given me? Do you even know what a Longaberger basket is? Hint: It’s a really overpriced, Made In America basket. 

There are thousands of these baskets in every shape, size, and holiday theme imaginable. Last Christmas, she bought me this “Santa Wine Basket”:

Even if I was the type of person who would put a wine bottle in a decorative basket, how often could I use this one? My mom suggested I wrap different colored ribbons around it to dress it up for holidays other than Christmas. 

Alright, let me get to the point. I was visiting my family in Ohio last weekend and my mom said, “Stay right there, I have something for you!” and I immediately began preparing myself to fake-love a basket/sewing kit/vase (I realize that to my crafty followers, my mother’s gifts sound perfect. She really is a gem.). 

Lo and behold, she came out carrying a book. A gigantic book. With Martha Stewart on the cover. Most of you don’t know me, so you may not realize that I am terrible at anything domestic. I’m lazy as f*ck, bad at cooking, never learned to sew, and am not interested in hosting any sort of party. Martha Stewart is not exactly my thang. 

I halfheartedly thanked my mom while making a mental list of friends who might like a 10-pound, hardcover book about garden parties. Luckily, since I was at my parents’ house, I got bored pretty quickly and decided to crack the cover. 

This book is a dream come true. Here’s a very short list of things I love:

1. Ridiculous things
2. Reading people’s journals
3. Learning about lifestyles that differ from my own

On every page of this book, there’s a picture from one of Martha Stewart’s many parties, and it always reveals a new incredible detail. The woman has acres of flowers. She dresses her dogs up for Christmas. She hosts an annual Egg Hunt for other people’s children and paints the eggs sparkly gold. 

While the pictures are hilarious, the sentences are the best part. Martha Stewart’s life is so unbelievable and she shares details in the most nonchalant way.  

This book is bringing me a tremendous amount of joy and I’ve decided to spread the goodness. As I read Martha’s Entertaining: A Year of Celebrations, I’m going to post the laugh out loud lines. You are very welcome!

Hey ladies! Do you want to live your dream, which is apparently being able to achieve both authorhood and motherhood? The only way to do it is if you limit yourself to one child.

At least that’s what is claimed by this Atlantic piece, the frankly titled “The Secret to Being Both a Successful Writer and a Mother: Have Just One Kid.” 

You can read the article for kicks if you’d like, but I’m sure you can imagine how untrue, unnecessary, unrealistic, and pretty much un-everything it is without following the link.

Besides the fact that there is a multitude of books written by women who have managed to publish books and raise more than one kid, HOW ABOUT:

• We stop acting like there’s a secret to writing success
• We don’t use Alice Walker and Joan Didion as examples of awesome parenting
• We let people (reminder: women are people) make their own personal decisions
• We quit trying to create brand new barriers for women to worry about
• We start treating writing like a job instead of a mysterious passion. Women can have more than one kid and be successful surgeons, CEO’s, farmers, lawyers, police officers. Writing is a job. 
• Instead of suggesting how women can manage everything on their own, we advise people to choose partners who are supportive of their goals and will share financial and family responsibilities. 

Award-winning author and mother Jane Smiley took to the comments:

I am Jane Smiley. I have written 23 books. I won the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Critics Circle Award. My last novel, Private Life, was named best novel of the year by the Atlantic in 2010. I have been short-listed for the Orange Prize (Horse Heaven). I have three children of my own and two stepchildren.

The key is not having one child, it is living in a place where there is excellent daycare and a social world that allows fathers to have the time and the motivation to fully share in raising kids. Ames, Iowa, where I lived for many years was just such a place. I thank you, Iowa State University and the Ames Community Pre-School Center for enabling my career and my life as a mother.

Preach!

Image via We Heart It. 

Moranthology, Caitlin Moran - This book made me love Caitlin Moran so hard. The lady is hilarious, her writing is beautiful, and her views seem so in sync with my own. I don’t even need to form opinions anymore, I’m just going to adopt whatever Caitlin Moran believes. Also, she wrote the most perfect essay to explain why libraries are absolutely necessary and shouldn’t be closed. 

A library is such a potent symbol of a town’s values: each one closed down might as well be six thousand stickers plastered over every available surface, reading “WE CHOSE TO BECOME MORE STUPID AND DULL.”

Someday, Someday, Maybe, Lauren Graham - I went into this book worried that I’d love Lorelai Gilmore a little less, but I was pleasantly surprised by her mad writing skillz. My only critique is that it’s classified as a regular novel when it reads more like YA (and there ain’t nothing wrong with YA, why would you even think that?). If you like Lorelai’s fast, witty banter and enjoy stories about creative people trying to make it in the Big City, then pick up this book. 

Like anyone with a brain/soul/stomach, I can’t wait to read Kate Christensen’s food memoir, Blue Plate Special. Why are you so far away, July 9 release date? Can an obsessive fan get an advance copy? 

Christensen’s upcoming book was highlighted on Parade’s 2013 Summer Reading List, which of course made me happy. I like any book list that includes thoughtful, diverse choices, and this one definitely accomplished that. 

However, there were a few lines that raised my brows: 

Who knows books better than Amazon? No one. So we asked their editors to pick the season’s top page-turners.

HA HA what? Every bookish person I stalk on tumblr knows books better than Amazon. Every bookseller. Every librarian. 

Then there was this questionable blurb about J. Courtney Sullivan’s The Engagements:

More substantive than you might expect, this follow-up from the author of Commencement and Maine is a smarter-than-average look at four relationships and how diamonds may (or may not) be part of the marriage machine. 

Am I the only one wincing from all those backhanded compliments?

And maybe I just have Jami Attenberg’s The Middlesteins on my mind a lot, but doesn’t this new Lionel Shriver book sound a lot like The Middlesteins?

Big Brother: A moving and disturbing story about a woman and her 300-plus-pound brother, whom she tries to save from eating himself to death. Can anyone “fix” a person bent on self-destruction? Is obesity a choice? 

The Washington Post wrote a glorious tribute to the Third Tuesday Book Club, an all-female group in the DC area that has been getting together to talk about books since 1963. 

There are many delicious details, including:

600 books, five dead husbands, 39 kids, 66 grandkids, two member deaths, and one divorce later, they will celebrate a half-century together at next month’s meeting.

“I remember sitting in this house with three kids, 10 hours a day, always thinking there was something wrong with me that I wasn’t getting joy, like the magazines told us we should, out of polishing furniture or cleaning the house.”

When they talked of this [late-night book club meetings] to wives outside the club, there was shock. “Did you get in trouble from your husband?” some would ask.

“I use a Kindle for my other book club, but always read real books for this club. This is my real club.”